When thinking of someone who has influenced your life, you may consider a celebrity, or a religious or political figure. Or perhaps a close friend or family member might immediately come to mind. The choice usually has something to do with self-improvement or finding an exceptional role model. But how often does someone think of a child as having life-changing influence on their life? A child can tiptoe quietly into your heart and make an impact on your life when you least expect it. That is what “Michael” did in my life.
Many years ago I was given a task so daunting my first impression was to toss in the towel and wonder if I was up to the challenge. When first given the assignment of working one-on-one with Michael, I questioned my ability to teach and his ability to learn. At age ten, his meager reading and math skills were that of a six-year-old first-grader, even though his mental capacity was considered “near normal.” He had been labeled “less than” and “stupid” by a family who didn’t know how to deal with a child who longed for love and attention but attempted to gain both by acting out and refusing to do his school work. How he had made it through five years of school and into the fifth grade still baffles me. He was allowed to pass without knowing the basics and now here he was, sitting at a table waiting for me.
Michael and I began working slowly, patiently, repetitively. His ability to read, even basic words, was stilted and deliberate. His math skills were scanty and buried beneath a protective covering of what little self-worth he still possessed. He was my only student and, day by day, very slowly, we practiced the three most important aspects of elementary education: reading, writing, and arithmetic.
And I began to see improvement.
The more Michael improved, the more self-confidence he gained. The more self-confidence he gained, the more eager he was to learn. His improvement rate changed from negligible progress to an exciting leaps-and-bounds evolution of not only his academics, but his sense of worth and confidence. Michael never gave up. He learned that he could succeed. Even when frustrated with a word we had read over and over, even when discouraged because of a simple addition problem, Michael never gave up.
Michael was not an extraordinary child. He did not qualify for the Gifted and Talented Education program. At the end of the school year he wasn’t quite ready for grade-level work, but he was close to catching up. He had changed — from a child who was a “problem” to a child who was succeeding, who was accomplishing, and who was taking great effort to learn. When you see a child make up his mind — a child who has to beat the odds to succeed, a child who keeps trying even when it seems useless — it changes your perspective on life. It changed mine.
Many people have influenced my life, and some probably should be recognized for their part in my personal growth. However, none come to mind as quickly as Michael, who in the ten months I worked one-on-one with him made me realize that nothing is impossible if you set your mind to it, if you reach for the highest mark, and if you don’t ever give up.